Mental Health and Addiction Counseling Services

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Should we be judged by our apple tree?

Thinking about perception and judgement today and how the “apple doesn’t fall far from the tree”. What does this mean, are we all destined to be the identical clone of those who bore us? Is this a benefit or a downfall? I guess it depends on your perception. Should we be held accountable for the actions of our parents and/or our grown children based off “the apple” concept? I heard about a family who took in their grandchild due to their child’s heroin addiction and has raised this child unconditionally for the past 3 years and with the recommendation of Children Services. The adoption is forthcoming and recommendations are needed and were provided by loved ones and friends (?). In one of the recommendations it was stated that this grandparent shouldn’t have custody because she raised that mother who became addicted and inevitably will do the same. This is preposterous…..we are not our parents choices, we are not our child’s choices. Do we influence each other, yes, absolutely, but so does society, peers and so on. How do we hold true to the notion that people can change, that we, yes, are innately born “us”, have genetic connections, born with personalities, and inevitably we are the outcomes of our choices then at the same time say no because your “apple” is rotten by association? I ask you before you judge remember that same judgement can be put upon you and would that perception be true? Behavior defines us not our apple tree!

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